“Love me like a reptile”: Confessions of a middle-aged fangirl

23 Mar

I love Lemmy.

Lemmy, by the way, is Lemmy Kilmister — founder, bass guitarist and frontman of British speed-metal band Motorhead.

My Lemmy love isn’t something I talk about often (well, not in excruciating detail), primarily because it’s one of those things best discussed with someone who already knows something, is curious about, or likes Lemmy and Motorhead. Otherwise, there’s little gratification. Having to explain all the backstory, song references, Lemmyisms, etc., is about as much fun as telling a joke and having to explain the punchline. (That reminds me — the post header is the title of a Motorhead song.)

But I’ll have a go, because Lemmy is worth discussing. And — did I say? — I love him. Here’s why:

He’s a nerd. Oh, sure, he wears black leather, drinks Jack Daniels nonstop, chain-smokes, and parties like a rock star. But he also lives in a cramped apartment full of World War II artifacts, stacks of history books, career memorabilia, and keepsakes from his fans. He watches the Discovery Channel and spends his free time obsessively playing a video game at the Rainbow Bar & Grill in Hollywood. The bad-boy thing doesn’t appeal to me, but the nerdiness does.

He’s got style, Lemmy style. In the ’70s, he developed his signature look: long black hair, mustache and muttonchops, skintight black pants, black shirt, Iron Cross necklace, epaulets, flashy knee-high leather boots. The resulting look is rocker-biker-pirate-cowboy-military-punk … Lemmy. The man knows what he likes and isn’t afraid to wear it. I respect that. And I do so covet his flamboyant custom-made boots.

He writes lyrics like these:

If you squeeze my lizard, I’ll put my snake on you. — Killed by Death, a song for which Lemmy made what’s probably the cheesiest music video ever. I LOVE cheese.

Know your body’s made to move, you feel it in your guts,
Rock ‘n’ roll ain’t worth the name if it don’t make you strut.Overkill

You win some, lose some, it’s still the same to me
The pleasure is to play, it makes no difference what you say
I don’t share your greed, the only card I need is
The Ace Of Spades. Ace of Spades

If you compromise your integrity, you should drown in your own blood. — One Short Life

He says things like this:

Lemmy's autobiography

 

“You’re supposed to laugh in life. Laughing exercises all the facial muscles and keeps you from getting old. Looking stern gives you terrible wrinkles.”

About music industry powers that be: “These people treat music purely as a commodity, like selling cans of beans. … Nobody seems to believe in the music anymore. The industry’s building all the time, but they’re killing the music. They’re trying to, anyway, but I won’t let them while I’m alive. … People are going to remember me, but the suits will be forgotten.”

“Our digestive systems aren’t made to handle vegetarian food. It makes you fart all the time and you get intestinal flora. Vegetarianism is unrealistic — that’s why cows have four stomachs and we have one.”

“It’s easy to have good manners — they’re free. I don’t know why everybody doesn’t have them.”

The Lemmy action figure — yes, I have it. Fits in well with my Doctor Who and Firefly figures.

Lemmy’s funny, outrageous, honest and humble, wears great boots, and will never appear on American Idol. What’s not to love?

On May 18, I get to see him perform live. Oh, I am going to love that.

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One Response to ““Love me like a reptile”: Confessions of a middle-aged fangirl”

  1. Cici Davidson March 28, 2011 at 7:43 pm #

    I think I love Lemmy, too!

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